As a mental health counselor that is harsh and judgmental person when it comes to anything said about my profession. I agree with 90% of the book. Thats high praise :)
People need to make sure their therapist isn’t insane.
That’s a million dollar question. If someone you love dearly would be looking for a competent therapist, how would you recommend your loved one approaches the search, please?
I listened to both podcasts with Jordan Peterson and Joe Rogan. Rogan is a much better listener and asks more thoughtful questions (in my opinion). Excited to read the book. I loved your first book.
As an almost 60 year old ex-teacher, mother of 3 and grandmother of 2 I agree with all you are saying. Now to help my Gen Z/ Millennial daughter-in-laws and sons make the time to read the book and listen. They already had tried to label my 2 year old grandson and were taking him to “therapy” for what a therapists claimed was “OT” because of his mother having Covid when she was pregnant with him. 🙄 After 6 weeks of them being in our home through the holidays last Nov/Dec I finally just had to say, “This little boy is a normal 2 year old who needs boundaries and authority in his life. He’s trying to be the boss and you are letting him. “ It is ridiculous that there are therapists out there labeling kids and teaching them at 2 to say “they feel sad”, instead of obeying the house rules. The therapist encouraged rolling on balls and stretching exercises to help him learn how to obey. What the heck? This gentle parenting/therapy excuse is out of control!!
Hope the truths in your book will be heeded! My daughter who is a senior in college told me last week she needed to go with her friend to the post office to mail a package because her friend had too much anxiety and was afraid to go to the post office alone. What in the world?? The fragile minds of most teens and early 20’s is astounding. Our daughter studied abroad her senior year of high school. However, I don’t think many of her college friends couldn’t do that now as young adults.
The school wanted me to get my older son (now 22) tested for ADHD and I said no. He was a normal, smart, active boy and I told them that he was bored and it was their job to keep him engaged. He ended up with a great teacher in 1st grade who recognized he was bored and that's why he kept talking and getting up, so she found interesting and challenging math lessons for him (he ended up with a 790 on the math SAT and majored in math in college). Some teachers are awful. Some are absolutely amazing. .... As an aside, once we got him into sports when he was 8, a lot of the "hyper-activity" subsided because he was able to channel his energy into something that physically tired him.
As a psychology PhD candidate (adolescent gender dysphoria), there are no words to convey how desperately this book is needed. It's a horror and a joy to read all at once.
I've been stepping outside the strict bounds of my PhD lately to begin writing on some of the issues I'm seeing in the mental health space - it's been nothing more than discussions in my living room the last couple of years, and I figure I better do a bit more than that.
It's so reassuring to pick up a book like Bad Therapy and see that you and many of those you interviewed are also trying to work out what the hell is going on, and what to do about it. It feels like sanity.
My husband & I could not put this book down. THANK YOU for explaining how we lost our 31 year old son. Your book was so validating of our parenting style: lovingly but firmly setting boundaries, teaching responsibility, respecting elders, etc. Then he went to college & was taught that was "emotional abuse" & hasn't spoken to us in years. Textbook behavior from that generation.
God bless you for exposing schools & SEL & all of it. Homeschooling is the only way thru. We learned too late w our older son, but wound up homeschooling our youngest & he's healthy, happy, & owns his own business. And finds the behavior of his brother utterly ridiculous.
Thank you! Wishing you ALL the success with this book!
I have contemplated the same thing, Antonia. The things my school board directors say about what they think they know about youth mental health and schools is "depressing".
In (overly) simplistic terms, for the sake of brevity, my parents’ generation was often beaten. (I’m 65). We were often spanked. We didn’t spank our kids, but used “punishments” like Time Outs or denial of privileges. Then it totally flipped over time with the kids being given the power and “wisdom”. Parents want the child’s approval, not vice versa. The kids are simultaneously arrogant and unmoored. No wonder so many are mentally ill. Children need rules, boundaries and told that often they just have to figure things out on their own and sometimes they’ll fail and so what, we all do. Safetyism, both physical and emotional is devastating to kids (and adults). It’s paralyzing and life limiting. But, it’s institutionalized policy now.
I read Bad Therapy very soon after its release, and for once, I am ahead of the trend! It was a really great book and one that I think is incredibly important to read.
Caught your Rogan episode . Must see for sure. It seems as though these crisis of the explosion of transgender / dysphoria in children and now your latest work have common themes. In a Venn diagram they would likely intersect at victimhood and money . Pathetic really . At any rate Bravo once again Abigail
I have enjoyed your various interviews on the subject of your book. Although funny enough, they all came out around the same time. So I was listening to nothing but you being interviewed for a week straight.
As someone who has been on the receiving end of therapy that actually did help somewhat, I understand why people want to believe it helps. Because for many it does, but I think like anything it becomes counterproductive at some point.
Eventually you have to do the work yourself without assistance. Live without a tightrope.
I'm halfway done and it's very good. I have 5 kids and my Gen Z kids are doing great -- it's my younger millennial (28) who is struggling and has been going to therapy for 5 years. Literally, ALL of her friends have been in or are in therapy (they are all between 26-35). I took her once to a therapist as a young teen because she begged me -- and she had always struggled with social anxiety (she still doesn't like large crowds -- I think this is normal for a more introverted personality and a minor health issue she had when she was in elementary school that made her self-conscious.) But when the therapist wanted to drug her I said no, so that was it. No more therapy. She learned using practical life skills to battle her social anxiety, went to college, has a full-time job. BUT she started going to therapy and now is trapped because to get the drugs (I am so mad about this) she has to go to therapy monthly. She has been convinced by the therapist that she needs anti-depressants and Adderall. But she's an adult and lives 2500 miles away and while we talk nearly every day, this is an off-limit subject. :(
I have anxiously awaited the release of this book. I accidentally ordered two copies but I am happy to have both so that I can loan them out. I have finished the book and listened to a bunch of the interviews. Thank you so much for all the hard work you put in to provide us with this excellent, timely, and important book. After reading your first book i am not surprised to find this one every bit as good. As the mother of a 13 year old girl I already feel more grounded and confident in the way I am raising my daughter. You remind me to just keep trusting my heart and stick with a common sense (and not very modern)parenting style. So far it’s working…. She’s doing fantastic ! I can hardly wait to hear what your next book subject will be.
Brilliant book Abigail. I finished the book in one day—as a parent of adult children I recognized much, but was horrified by what is happening in our schools. I have since bought 5 copies, for my kids, for my neighbor who was eager to read it after I shared my recap. I will continue to spread the word.
Congratulations Abigail. Your fearless reporting that goes against the mainstream narrative is needed and worthy of all the accolades in the reviews.
As a mental health counselor that is harsh and judgmental person when it comes to anything said about my profession. I agree with 90% of the book. Thats high praise :)
People need to make sure their therapist isn’t insane.
That’s a million dollar question. If someone you love dearly would be looking for a competent therapist, how would you recommend your loved one approaches the search, please?
I listened to both podcasts with Jordan Peterson and Joe Rogan. Rogan is a much better listener and asks more thoughtful questions (in my opinion). Excited to read the book. I loved your first book.
As an almost 60 year old ex-teacher, mother of 3 and grandmother of 2 I agree with all you are saying. Now to help my Gen Z/ Millennial daughter-in-laws and sons make the time to read the book and listen. They already had tried to label my 2 year old grandson and were taking him to “therapy” for what a therapists claimed was “OT” because of his mother having Covid when she was pregnant with him. 🙄 After 6 weeks of them being in our home through the holidays last Nov/Dec I finally just had to say, “This little boy is a normal 2 year old who needs boundaries and authority in his life. He’s trying to be the boss and you are letting him. “ It is ridiculous that there are therapists out there labeling kids and teaching them at 2 to say “they feel sad”, instead of obeying the house rules. The therapist encouraged rolling on balls and stretching exercises to help him learn how to obey. What the heck? This gentle parenting/therapy excuse is out of control!!
Hope the truths in your book will be heeded! My daughter who is a senior in college told me last week she needed to go with her friend to the post office to mail a package because her friend had too much anxiety and was afraid to go to the post office alone. What in the world?? The fragile minds of most teens and early 20’s is astounding. Our daughter studied abroad her senior year of high school. However, I don’t think many of her college friends couldn’t do that now as young adults.
What is OT?
The school wanted me to get my older son (now 22) tested for ADHD and I said no. He was a normal, smart, active boy and I told them that he was bored and it was their job to keep him engaged. He ended up with a great teacher in 1st grade who recognized he was bored and that's why he kept talking and getting up, so she found interesting and challenging math lessons for him (he ended up with a 790 on the math SAT and majored in math in college). Some teachers are awful. Some are absolutely amazing. .... As an aside, once we got him into sports when he was 8, a lot of the "hyper-activity" subsided because he was able to channel his energy into something that physically tired him.
As a psychology PhD candidate (adolescent gender dysphoria), there are no words to convey how desperately this book is needed. It's a horror and a joy to read all at once.
I can't tell you how much I appreciate this comment. Thank you!
I've been stepping outside the strict bounds of my PhD lately to begin writing on some of the issues I'm seeing in the mental health space - it's been nothing more than discussions in my living room the last couple of years, and I figure I better do a bit more than that.
It's so reassuring to pick up a book like Bad Therapy and see that you and many of those you interviewed are also trying to work out what the hell is going on, and what to do about it. It feels like sanity.
My husband & I could not put this book down. THANK YOU for explaining how we lost our 31 year old son. Your book was so validating of our parenting style: lovingly but firmly setting boundaries, teaching responsibility, respecting elders, etc. Then he went to college & was taught that was "emotional abuse" & hasn't spoken to us in years. Textbook behavior from that generation.
God bless you for exposing schools & SEL & all of it. Homeschooling is the only way thru. We learned too late w our older son, but wound up homeschooling our youngest & he's healthy, happy, & owns his own business. And finds the behavior of his brother utterly ridiculous.
Thank you! Wishing you ALL the success with this book!
What a beautiful note. Thank you. I’m very sorry to hear about your son, part of a growing trend. You are not alone. Xx
I am listening to the audio version of the book and buying 6 copies to give to school board members in my county.
I have contemplated the same thing, Antonia. The things my school board directors say about what they think they know about youth mental health and schools is "depressing".
In (overly) simplistic terms, for the sake of brevity, my parents’ generation was often beaten. (I’m 65). We were often spanked. We didn’t spank our kids, but used “punishments” like Time Outs or denial of privileges. Then it totally flipped over time with the kids being given the power and “wisdom”. Parents want the child’s approval, not vice versa. The kids are simultaneously arrogant and unmoored. No wonder so many are mentally ill. Children need rules, boundaries and told that often they just have to figure things out on their own and sometimes they’ll fail and so what, we all do. Safetyism, both physical and emotional is devastating to kids (and adults). It’s paralyzing and life limiting. But, it’s institutionalized policy now.
I read Bad Therapy very soon after its release, and for once, I am ahead of the trend! It was a really great book and one that I think is incredibly important to read.
Caught your Rogan episode . Must see for sure. It seems as though these crisis of the explosion of transgender / dysphoria in children and now your latest work have common themes. In a Venn diagram they would likely intersect at victimhood and money . Pathetic really . At any rate Bravo once again Abigail
I have enjoyed your various interviews on the subject of your book. Although funny enough, they all came out around the same time. So I was listening to nothing but you being interviewed for a week straight.
As someone who has been on the receiving end of therapy that actually did help somewhat, I understand why people want to believe it helps. Because for many it does, but I think like anything it becomes counterproductive at some point.
Eventually you have to do the work yourself without assistance. Live without a tightrope.
Wow, you couldn't ask for better reviews. Congratulations, and thank you for writing this much-needed book.
Congratulations Abigail. It's an important book and beautifully written. As a teacher and parent, I pray that your book is widely read.
I'm halfway done and it's very good. I have 5 kids and my Gen Z kids are doing great -- it's my younger millennial (28) who is struggling and has been going to therapy for 5 years. Literally, ALL of her friends have been in or are in therapy (they are all between 26-35). I took her once to a therapist as a young teen because she begged me -- and she had always struggled with social anxiety (she still doesn't like large crowds -- I think this is normal for a more introverted personality and a minor health issue she had when she was in elementary school that made her self-conscious.) But when the therapist wanted to drug her I said no, so that was it. No more therapy. She learned using practical life skills to battle her social anxiety, went to college, has a full-time job. BUT she started going to therapy and now is trapped because to get the drugs (I am so mad about this) she has to go to therapy monthly. She has been convinced by the therapist that she needs anti-depressants and Adderall. But she's an adult and lives 2500 miles away and while we talk nearly every day, this is an off-limit subject. :(
I have anxiously awaited the release of this book. I accidentally ordered two copies but I am happy to have both so that I can loan them out. I have finished the book and listened to a bunch of the interviews. Thank you so much for all the hard work you put in to provide us with this excellent, timely, and important book. After reading your first book i am not surprised to find this one every bit as good. As the mother of a 13 year old girl I already feel more grounded and confident in the way I am raising my daughter. You remind me to just keep trusting my heart and stick with a common sense (and not very modern)parenting style. So far it’s working…. She’s doing fantastic ! I can hardly wait to hear what your next book subject will be.
Now I’m laughing that I used the term “anxiously awaited”. Anxious ..such an overused word. I really meant eagerly awaited.
Fantastic!! The damage therapists did to my daughter is awful. Luckily my sons kept away from them and they are doing just wonderfully.
Excellent reviews 👏👏👏 No. 1 for a reason….outstanding work and dedication.
Brilliant book Abigail. I finished the book in one day—as a parent of adult children I recognized much, but was horrified by what is happening in our schools. I have since bought 5 copies, for my kids, for my neighbor who was eager to read it after I shared my recap. I will continue to spread the word.
Congratulations Abigail. Your fearless reporting that goes against the mainstream narrative is needed and worthy of all the accolades in the reviews.